Example of Documented Self-Assessment

       Another area that I deeply needed to improve was sentence structure. My professor assigned sentence revision sheets, which had sentences from my fellow classmates including myself. I particularly liked this approach instead of reading random sentences about topics that had no influence on us. Reading my own sentences helped me to realize that I was having problems with sentence structure, and forced me to focus on them. The following sentence is from a revision sheet that I had corrected. This sentence was from my first essay, and the correction shows the drastic improvement in my ability to edit and apply what Professor X had taught us.

Before: These questions did not fade during her classes, even while sitting out of gym for the simple fact getting a freak injury and would miss the game.
After: Questions about the game did not fade from her mind during her classes, especially in gym class, where she sat out to avoid getting a freak injury.

Transition sentences have always wreaked havoc with my paragraph formation. Through all the meetings with my professor and the writing center I have learned how make transitions much smoother. Here is an example of an original sentence, then the transitional one:

“Two interviews were conducted, one with a girl of thirteen and another eighteen, both of whom play sports at different levels.”
“Two interview were conducted, one with a thirteen year old girl named Jackie, and another with an eighteen year old girl named Lauren, both of whom play sports at different levels.” (Transition)